No one likes to lose. From screaming and stamping your feet when you are little kid to maybe getting a little bit too upset and the games controller magically somehow flying across the room by itself, losing can really bring out a weird and quite angry side of most of us. Plus, we can’t even keep track of how many ‘sore loser’ moments have caused a big family feud around the Monopoly board at Christmas time. So, we think it might finally be time to nip this bad behaviour in the bud and make sure you can lose as gracefully as Jonathan Van Ness is on ice skates. 

1) Don’t get angry or aggressive 

We know – this is easier said than done right? When you are feeling fired up, it seems like the only solution is to shout about it. Actually though, getting angry is more than likely going to end up losing you access to online games if your anger becomes something more toxic, such as swearing or getting aggressive to other players. If you’re playing sphere is away from the console, then it might end up losing you some playing buddies as well. 

Try a quick technique for dispelling that feeling of anger bubbling up – the Naam Yoga Hand Trick. Using your fingertips, apply pressure to the space between the knuckles of your index and middle fingers. This creates a sense of immediate relaxation by activating a nerve that loosens the area around your heart (don’t worry, it’s not as life-threatening as it sounds). Whilst you are doing it, breathe in through your nose for three seconds, and out for three seconds. If only the Incredible Hulk knew this one. 

 

2) Try not to get too upset

Sometimes, you just can’t help it. The sting of defeat quickly becomes that familiar feeling of stinging behind your eyes like when your brother beat you at Connect 4 for the first time when you were a kid. 

The important thing to remember is that it is ok to feel upset about things, and often ignoring it will eventually make it worse. But, if this is part of a pattern of behaviour after losing every game you ever play even as you get older, there may be something that you need to have a think about addressing. 

When you start to feel like you feeling a bit overwhelmed by the sense of defeat, try a quick mindfulness technique. Breathing deeply and slowly, think about five things you can see, four things you can touch, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one thing you can taste around you.

Taking a moment to concentrate on something other than how upset or angry you are feeling and instead focus on your body should help to keep you calm and relaxed.

 

3) Don’t take it out on other players 

This a sure-fire way to lose any chance of playing again. Alienating other players by getting aggressive, rude or even harassing them could not only lose you friends, but it could also get you banned from playing long term – especially true if you are an online gamer or a tournament player in games like Magic the Gathering or Warhammer. 

If you are in an online game and you feel like another player has done you dirty through breaking the rules, or have been targeting you, report them. If it is Fortnite specifically, check out our guide to reporting in the game here

 

4) Don’t quit 

It can be super tempting when you are losing, to bow out of the game altogether.  Not only will this not solve anything, but it has the potential to ruin everyone else’s experience.

Instead of quitting, get back up and keep trying – the more you play any game, the better you will get. Use it as a learning opportunity, a chance to see what better players than you do and steal their skills for next time. You never know, when the next game rolls around, you could be one coming out on top because you stayed in the losing battle.

 

Check out our article on 7 Steps to Being a Better Gamer for more ideas on how to improve your online gameplay!

5) Remember – it’s only a game 

No matter if it’s a football match or FIFA, a battle royale in Tilted Towers or a battle for Mayfair in Monopoly, it is important to remember that it is only a game. Whilst yes, they are designed to be competitive, they are also designed to be fun.

If you find the game is stressing you out, take a step back from it and take a break from playing for a while. When you go back, you might find you enjoy it more, and you won’t have lost friends or respect like you might have done had you done some of the other stuff written above. We call that a win.

 


For more hilarious memes, inspirational quotes, cute pics and more, follow us on Instagram @ditchthelabel

RSS FORUM CHATS

  • Introduction for anyone who cares ✨✨
    Hey I'm Melina 😊. I am bisexual (and asexual 😊) Only my best friend (and anyone reading this) knows my sexuality and I'm planning on telling my homophobic family too when I am financially stable, but I am known for making spur of the moment decisions and changing my mind last minute so who knows! […]
  • Hobbies
    Hey all, I was wondering what the acceptable number of hobbies is because I have 30 hobbies and I don't know what to do
  • This club is so good
    This club is so good that it has now become a lunchtime club at my school so well done to you bingabong
  • came out as bi to parents... they dont beleive me
    so a few days ago i came out as bi to my parents... they dont believe me. they think i was 1. wanting attention 2. friends are a bad influence and made me think this 3.just questioning myself i said this earlier what do ido
  • the safe lgbt chat
    hey! I hope everyone is having a good day and I just wanted to say that if you want to talk on here for advice or just to have a friend this is a place to be! for some that don't know me my name is leaf and I go by he/him pronouns. I am […]
  • Does anyone else agree that social media is toxic?
    Recently social media toxicity has been on my mind. I see lots of people on the internet promoting toxic lifestyles, getting followers, subscribers, and money. Also, it seems like the bigwigs of social media are very toxic, and often not expecting of others. Any one else feel this way?

What is trolling?

“Trolling” in an online game is most commonly used to described when players go out of their way to annoy everyone and make other players rage. The acts of trolling can range anywhere from committing friendly fire to just telling other players that they suck, repeatedly. Now, while this seems like harmless fun on the surface, it can have some really bad effects for those on the receiving end. Not only is the game ruined for everyone else but in some cases, the consequences can be way more severe than just a broken controller. 😡

If you would prefer the easier to read version, please click here.

So, what’s the problem?

Phrases like, “there’s no real harm” get thrown out a lot. This infuriates me because the point of trolling is to cause harm and effects of trolling are mostly all negative. One form of trolling is spamming game chats so that players reading it will be distracted and depending what kind of game you’re playing, the effects will vary. For example; in an FPS, the reader will likely die… (in game) this could ruin their hard work and KD ratio.

Another example would be if you’re playing online and the game chat is being spammed, half of the player’s screens are blocked. This prevents them from being able to score or defend. When people are trolling servers, it makes other players more likely to rage quit. This ruins games for everyone else because in most cases they will be replaced with a bot and who wants to play an online game filled with AI?!

Dear Trolls…

You might think “…but making them angry is the point?!” Well, my response is this… where’s the fun in that? What is the point in going out of your way to make someone that you can’t even see angry? In most cases it won’t affect their day, however in some, it can have a more serious effect. Trolling can have deeper impacts than you might think. For example, when taken too far, trolling can lead to paranoia and can affect sleep. I know this because of my own personal experiences online.

What games are doing to combat trolling

Aside from your usual timeouts or server bans, developers are taking steps to combat the trolls and prevent trolling. A prime example of this is Blizzard. Blizzard are the creators of the popular online shooter, Overwatch. What they have done is, when common trolling phrases are used such as “GG EZ” the text will automatically be changed into a randomly generated phrase by Blizzard. This can be anything from polite gestures to self-deprecating insults. Some examples include:


“Well played. I salute you all.”

“Gee whiz! That was fun. Good playing!”

“It’s past my bedtime. Please don’t tell my mommy.”

“I’m wrestling with some insecurity issues in my life but thank you all for playing with me.”

This was a wonderful idea from Blizzard and has had an overall positive effect to their online game chats. Hopefully, this will become commonplace amongst all Blizzard titles moving forward.

But wait… there’s more

In hardcore modes of Call Of Duty, players that team kill are kicked from the game. While this has been around for a while now, it is important to recognise the importance of the feature introduced all the way back in 2007. Simple things like this can be done to prevent trolling in online games.

It’s far from over

Despite developers best efforts, trolling is still a massive issue that continues to slow down the development of online gamers and gaming. Games are still being ruined by these unfunny people – we all have to do what we can to put an end to it. Not only must we block, mute and report them, but we have to do our best to make in game chats positive, safe spaces again for all gamers. As well as this, we have to let them know that they’re not affecting us, by not reacting to them at all. Don’t give people who troll the satisfaction of a response.🙄

Other than that, all we can really do is play on.

Have any experiences or thoughts on trolling? Disagree with me? Let us know in community. If you enjoyed this and want some more, click here for an article on some gaming terminology.

RSS FORUM CHATS

  • Introduction for anyone who cares ✨✨
    Hey I'm Melina 😊. I am bisexual (and asexual 😊) Only my best friend (and anyone reading this) knows my sexuality and I'm planning on telling my homophobic family too when I am financially stable, but I am known for making spur of the moment decisions and changing my mind last minute so who knows! […]
  • Hobbies
    Hey all, I was wondering what the acceptable number of hobbies is because I have 30 hobbies and I don't know what to do
  • This club is so good
    This club is so good that it has now become a lunchtime club at my school so well done to you bingabong
  • came out as bi to parents... they dont beleive me
    so a few days ago i came out as bi to my parents... they dont believe me. they think i was 1. wanting attention 2. friends are a bad influence and made me think this 3.just questioning myself i said this earlier what do ido
  • the safe lgbt chat
    hey! I hope everyone is having a good day and I just wanted to say that if you want to talk on here for advice or just to have a friend this is a place to be! for some that don't know me my name is leaf and I go by he/him pronouns. I am […]
  • Does anyone else agree that social media is toxic?
    Recently social media toxicity has been on my mind. I see lots of people on the internet promoting toxic lifestyles, getting followers, subscribers, and money. Also, it seems like the bigwigs of social media are very toxic, and often not expecting of others. Any one else feel this way?

The internet is pretty sweet right? We can all agree on that. But for people who are dealing with online hate, it can be a really rubbish place to spend time. The comments section on most articles, photos, YouTube videos and and celebrity Instagram’s are pretty much a minefield of tough to read insults or outright lies, and when that is directed at you, it can feel overwhelming and pretty damn lonely.

The most important thing to remember if you are going through online abuse is that you are not alone. We’ve got your back and that’s why we’ve created a toolkit of how to deal with online hate.

1) Breathe 

Getting angry after receiving some nasty comments is pretty unsurprising, especially when a lot of them are written just to upset you. Using breathing techniques will help get your emotions under control and give you a minute to think about what you want to do next.

Try following the GIF below – breathe in as the circle expands and breathe out as it gets smaller, and repeat. It might not have you feeling completely chill, but it should help to take the edge off and clear your mind a little. 

2) Think 

Being a keyboard warrior can be a good thing when it comes to saving the planet, or fighting injustice, but not so much when it comes to dealing with online hate. It’s natural to want to jump on your phone and start tapping away a reply that is both hilarious and devastating, but you might find yourself quickly stuck in a feud that even a drama channel would probably stay out of.

So, instead of insulting them back, think about what you really want to happen as a result of this – the chances are, a long drawn out argument in your DM’s is probably not the one. 

3) Report it 

Everyone should have a pretty basic understanding of when and where to report stuff online and on different platforms. You can find a super quick guide to where you can do it on the big 3 (Facebook, Twitter and Instagram) in our Ultimate Guide to Cyberbullying here.

You can also report it to us here if you have already tried reporting to social media sites with no luck and we will get it taken down for you. Basically, we’ve done all the work for you so you can just get it sorted!

4) Take a Break

If it’s on social media, take a break from it. We know it’s often easier said than done, when friends are organising their boss weekend plans in IG DM’s, but it will be pretty crucial to you feeling better. It can feel really overwhelming when you are dealing with online hate, but taking a break from where it is happening will help you realise that your world is much bigger than your inbox. 

Try leaving your phone at home when you hang out with your pals or put it somewhere safe and out of sight when you are chilling with the family, an turn off your social media notifications. Trust us, a little bit of distance from it will make the world of difference.

If you have a big following who expect to see some new pictures uploaded every day, try using a scheduling service so you can still take your much-needed break without your audience getting rowdy for their avocado toast pic.

4) Take Care of You 

Dealing with online hate can be really stressful. Try some stress management techniques to make sure you are looking after yourself through it all. This epic list of 101 Ways to Chill Out and Reduce Stress will give you some super speedy suggestions for getting on top of it, and you can also read our Ultimate Guide to Stress to understand a bit more about it. 

A bit of self-care goes a long way when you are dealing with online hate. Make sure you take a bit of time for yourself to do something you love or that you find relaxing that doesn’t involve being glued to your phone.

Why not try taking a long walk, practising a new makeup look or hairstyle, invite a friend out for a kick about or watch your fave movie complete with a gigantic bowl of popcorn. Doing what you love will help you focus on yourself rather than the situation and remind you that you are so much more than the hate you’re getting. 

6) Talk to Someone 

Getting online abuse can make you really angry but it can also make you feel pretty lonely. The important thing to remember is that you are not alone in this, and we’re certainly here if you wanna get it off your chest. Click here to join our community and get advice from real people like you and our trained mentors. 

Otherwise, talking to a trusted friend, parent, teacher, or colleague will help you have an outlet for what is going on and ensures you will have someone to support you through it.

Want to learn more?

This article is part of our #GamersUnite series in partnership with EA Games. Visit the hub for more advice, tips and ways to support other gamers.

RSS FORUM CHATS

  • Introduction for anyone who cares ✨✨
    Hey I'm Melina 😊. I am bisexual (and asexual 😊) Only my best friend (and anyone reading this) knows my sexuality and I'm planning on telling my homophobic family too when I am financially stable, but I am known for making spur of the moment decisions and changing my mind last minute so who knows! […]
  • Hobbies
    Hey all, I was wondering what the acceptable number of hobbies is because I have 30 hobbies and I don't know what to do
  • This club is so good
    This club is so good that it has now become a lunchtime club at my school so well done to you bingabong
  • came out as bi to parents... they dont beleive me
    so a few days ago i came out as bi to my parents... they dont believe me. they think i was 1. wanting attention 2. friends are a bad influence and made me think this 3.just questioning myself i said this earlier what do ido
  • the safe lgbt chat
    hey! I hope everyone is having a good day and I just wanted to say that if you want to talk on here for advice or just to have a friend this is a place to be! for some that don't know me my name is leaf and I go by he/him pronouns. I am […]
  • Does anyone else agree that social media is toxic?
    Recently social media toxicity has been on my mind. I see lots of people on the internet promoting toxic lifestyles, getting followers, subscribers, and money. Also, it seems like the bigwigs of social media are very toxic, and often not expecting of others. Any one else feel this way?

Probably everyone at some point has thought about the possibility of making money from gaming at some point in their life. Maybe it was when you were 10 and mastering your Game Boy, or maybe you are deep in Twitch streams every day after class now.

If you game frequently though, you know there are always ways to get better. That’s why we have put together a little list of tips for making the fastest improvements to your gaming.

1) Team work makes the dream work

It may be a very obvious thing to day, but if you’re game of choice is a team game, communication is the key to success. Always make sure you are updating others on your location, planning tactics or calling for the ball (#RocketLeagueForever) as well as letting the rest of your team know what the opposition are up to.

Just make sure you are staying on the right side of the rule book – Fortnite publishers Epic are anti-teaming in a solo game of Battle Royale and have said they will be cracking down on those who take on the 100 in illegal teams so make sure you are playing by the rules before creating a squad.

2) Play by the rules 

There has been a lot of talk recently about the level of cheating in online gaming. Whilst it might seem tempting as a quick way to rise through the ranks of your online opponents, cheating is a big risk. Apex Legends just banned 350,000 players for cheating in the game, and publishers Respawn can track hardware ID to ensure you can’t just start a new account with a new email.

Plus, it’s not just them – other publishers are cracking down on the use of cheating apps and tactics. Basically, don’t do it – or you’ll get banned at some point. And you can’t improve on your gaming with no game to do it in. 

3) Take it from the pros

It’s true in any sport ever – you learn from people who are better than you at the game. So put the controller down and hit up Twitch, YouTube, and Reddit. If your pals are better, take some pointers from them after they have had a particularly good run. It all adds up!

Also, if you can, get yourself down to a gaming expo or convention – these events are full of brands, publishers, developers and pro gamers who are literally waiting to share their advice, challenge you to tournaments and let you try new games. All of this experience is sure to add to your gameplay. 

4) Replay Replay Replay

If someone has owned you with a kill only Shroud could dream of, don’t take it personally. In fact, watch the action replays of how they managed it. That was you can see what you did wrong and what they did right so that you aren’t making the same mistakes twice, and steal their tactics for next time. You’ll soon have a streak to die for (not you though – you are too good to die now).

5) Cut the toxicity 

We’ve all heard a lot about toxic gaming lately. But it is true that cutting some of this behaviour, or removing yourself from a match that is full of it, will definitely help to improve your game play. Insulting, abusive language, cheating, blaming every bad move on other players – if you are filling up your game time with all of this then how are you ever going to get better?

Plus, if you are around it all the time, the game quickly becomes way less fun than before. So cut out the toxic behaviour from your gaming, whether it is you or others who are doing it, and start focussing on other things. 

6) Explore 

It might sound obvious, but remember to have fun whilst you are playing. Explore new maps, worm out those elusive Easter Eggs you heard about on Twitter, play a round just with your buddies for the LOLs.

Taking it all too seriously is a sure fire way to get worked up, and anger never helped anyone to win a game of Battle Royale. This is a great way to reset any toxic behaviour and get your gaming back to having fun. Remember – if it’s fun, the hours you spend getting better will go by in no time. 

For daily inspiration, influencer takeovers, cute pics and loads more, follow us on Instagram @ditchthelabel

7) Take regular breaks

We’ve all had days where it just feels right, you are hitting your shots, getting lucky and everyone is playing like a dream. But sometimes we need to break up the days by moving our bodies, getting some fresh air and stretching.

This will help you get even better at gaming as it is proven that a break can improve attention spans, drinking water can improve your reaction times and sitting in a good posture will help your brain focus on the game more.

Find more ways to help you balance your gaming / life balance:


If you or someone you know is experiencing cyberbullying or just wants to talk about gaming, join the Ditch the Label community here and we can help.

Join our community for advice & support

An awesome community filled with like-minded people and trained support mentors to help you through the tough stuff. Create a free, confidential account and join the conversation in seconds.

RSS FORUM CHATS

  • Introduction for anyone who cares ✨✨
    Hey I'm Melina 😊. I am bisexual (and asexual 😊) Only my best friend (and anyone reading this) knows my sexuality and I'm planning on telling my homophobic family too when I am financially stable, but I am known for making spur of the moment decisions and changing my mind last minute so who knows! […]
  • Hobbies
    Hey all, I was wondering what the acceptable number of hobbies is because I have 30 hobbies and I don't know what to do
  • This club is so good
    This club is so good that it has now become a lunchtime club at my school so well done to you bingabong
  • came out as bi to parents... they dont beleive me
    so a few days ago i came out as bi to my parents... they dont believe me. they think i was 1. wanting attention 2. friends are a bad influence and made me think this 3.just questioning myself i said this earlier what do ido
  • the safe lgbt chat
    hey! I hope everyone is having a good day and I just wanted to say that if you want to talk on here for advice or just to have a friend this is a place to be! for some that don't know me my name is leaf and I go by he/him pronouns. I am […]
  • Does anyone else agree that social media is toxic?
    Recently social media toxicity has been on my mind. I see lots of people on the internet promoting toxic lifestyles, getting followers, subscribers, and money. Also, it seems like the bigwigs of social media are very toxic, and often not expecting of others. Any one else feel this way?

Have you ever been playing an online game and had no idea what everyone was talking about? If yes, this may be of use to you. If not… hopefully, this helps anyway. Here is some common gaming terminology to help you understand what everyone is saying.

Common terms

So to get you started on this, here are a few common phrases that will help you understand what everyone is trying to say:

Achievement – when a player completes specific tasks the game will reward them with an achievement trophy

Easter egg – A secret hidden within a game by developers.

Triple-A or AAA – When a game is described as “AAA” it means it has a high budget and created by a major studio

Noob – To be called a noob means that you have the gaming skill of a new player (it’s an insult)

Clan – A clan is a group of gamers together in a game. Just think of it as an online gang

Spawn – The starting point for a character

Nerf The deliberate weakening of a character, weapon or tool so it is balanced with other characters, weapons and tools

Hacker – A player that has broken into the game and changed or manipulated it

Griefer – somebody that deliberately trolls or harasses other players

Skin – It can be a different character design, or a different colour item or piece of clothing (typically these are earned by playing the game a lot or paying with a micro-transaction)

Open Beta – A pre-release version of a game that is opened to users to play before it is released to test features and functionality

Open-world – When a game has a huge map to explore and storylines’ narratives are designed to be non-linear

Bug A broken part of a game

RP – Role-playing inside a game. Sometimes it doesn’t need to be a role-playing game, but people will play it as one nonetheless

Killstreak when multiple kills are made during one life in the game

Sweaty – trying really hard at the game

Camper – a player hiding in the same location to try and sneak up or surprise people

Microtransaction/s – downloadable content that people pay for using a small amount of money

Ragequit – somebody who quits the game mid-way through due to frustration or anger

Mod – a modification to the original game, sometimes can be a fully-fledged version of the game. Some mods have become full-games in themselves.

Lag – a slow internet moment that can ruin the game

Buff – a positive change to a weapon, character or tool

Salty Being upset or bitter

Grind – To constantly put in effort at getting better at a game, to unlock an achievement or item

Sus – short for “suspicious”

Dub or ‘w’ – A win

Jebaited – to be exposed

Pog – used as a variation on ‘wow’

Bot – an AI-controlled character in a game

Smurf – An experienced player creates a new account to play against lower skilled players

Rez – to resurrect a fallen or dead player in a game

Kappa – a word indicating sacarsm

Aggro – A player or character in game is getting aggressive at you

Drops – a unlockable item which contains rare items or achievements

Cheese – A way for players to win a game that developers did not foresee

Alpha, Bravo or Charlie – Flags A, B or C

Feeder – somebody who is dying repeatedly (either intentionally or not)

Rekt – Usually used when someone has out-played another player

I know, I know, this is basically like learning a new language. We’ll do one more. Sound good? Here are a few common words you can use to communicate with your gaming friends.

Abbreviations

These are quite popular in games as it makes ordinarily long sentences easier to type.cou

AFK – Away From Keyboard

NPC – Non-Playable Character

IRL – In Real Life

GG – Good Game

FPS – First Person Shooter

MOBA – Multiplayer online battle arena

MMO – Massively Multiplayer Online

RPG – Role-playing game

BR – Battle Royale

F2P – Free to play

PTW – Play to win

OP – Over-Powered

WP – Well played

XP – Experience Points

GLHF – Good luck, have fun

DLC – Downloadable Content

PVP – Player vs player

PVE – Player vs environment

NP – No problem

AD – Attack damage

HP – health points

FTW – “for the win”

PK – Player killer

EZ – ‘easy’

KD – Kill death ratio

DC – Disconnected from the game

OTW – On the way

Lb+Y – Used in FIFA to Lb+y or LbY is to play a through ball over the top of the defence.


Hopefully, you’ve learned something from this and can now understand what everyone’s talking about or at least have a better understanding of some of this language.

Like it? Feel free to tell us in our community. For more gaming related articles written, check out our gaming hub here:

RSS FORUM CHATS

  • Introduction for anyone who cares ✨✨
    Hey I'm Melina 😊. I am bisexual (and asexual 😊) Only my best friend (and anyone reading this) knows my sexuality and I'm planning on telling my homophobic family too when I am financially stable, but I am known for making spur of the moment decisions and changing my mind last minute so who knows! […]
  • Hobbies
    Hey all, I was wondering what the acceptable number of hobbies is because I have 30 hobbies and I don't know what to do
  • This club is so good
    This club is so good that it has now become a lunchtime club at my school so well done to you bingabong
  • came out as bi to parents... they dont beleive me
    so a few days ago i came out as bi to my parents... they dont believe me. they think i was 1. wanting attention 2. friends are a bad influence and made me think this 3.just questioning myself i said this earlier what do ido
  • the safe lgbt chat
    hey! I hope everyone is having a good day and I just wanted to say that if you want to talk on here for advice or just to have a friend this is a place to be! for some that don't know me my name is leaf and I go by he/him pronouns. I am […]
  • Does anyone else agree that social media is toxic?
    Recently social media toxicity has been on my mind. I see lots of people on the internet promoting toxic lifestyles, getting followers, subscribers, and money. Also, it seems like the bigwigs of social media are very toxic, and often not expecting of others. Any one else feel this way?

We know from our research that up to 7 in 10 young people experience cyberbullying before the age of 18. Cyberbullying comes in many different forms and is something that is totally subjective to the recipient.

A common form of cyberbullying is in-game abuse (harassment from other gamers whilst in online mode). Dealing with bullying in a game and in-game abuse can be extremely upsetting, distressing and draining – and it also spoils what is a very enjoyable hobby!

It is often hard to identify the appropriate course of action to take to address and improve the situation. With this in mind, we have compiled a short list of things you should and shouldn’t do if you are at the receiving end of in-game abuse. Happy gaming and GG!

1. Don’t respond with aggression.

Often reacting in an aggressive manner can make the situation worse and can put you at risk of further abuse. If you feel it is a safe and appropriate action to take, maybe try calmly communicating with the person who is doing the cyberbullying.

Remember to challenge the behaviour, not the person – so instead of accusing the person of being a ‘bully’, explain why their actions or words are causing you distress. For example, instead of saying “you’re upsetting me”, you could say “what you said/did has upset me”.  If the bullying still persists after taking this action, see point 2.

2. Do block/report the person that is cyberbullying you.

You can block and report the users who are bullying you at any time – remember that these options are in place to support and protect gamers from abuse. The type of gaming environment you are in will determine which course of action is best to take.

Speak with other gamers and check your headset to see if you can activate options to mute/disable audio chat and turn off the screen text. You could also contact the game administrators or moderators and report the user.

3. Don’t have your personal information available.

We recommend that you keep your privacy settings high and do not connect with anybody who you do not know offline. People may not always be who they say they are and you could be putting yourself and those that you care about at risk.

Never give away personal details like your full name, telephone, address etc to someone you have not met offline either. If somebody is exhibiting threatening behaviour, or has your personal information and is giving you the impression that your safety might be at risk, contact the police or a trusted adult immediately.

4. Don’t take it personally.

Remember that the person who is abusing you in-game is the one with the issue, not you. More importantly, remember that it is very likely they don’t even know you! What you are experiencing is in no way your fault; people experience bullying not because of their sexuality, gender identity, race, appearance, disability or any other unique factor; it is because of the attitude towards the factor. The only thing possible to change is attitudes – you are perfect the way you are.

5. Don’t seek revenge.

Gandhi once said, “An eye for eye only ends up making the whole world blind.” Think about the repercussions of your actions – what can really be gained by seeking revenge? You might even get yourself in trouble with the game’s moderators. It is far better to save yourself from the possibility of further trauma and focus on the good things in your life. Look at how you can move forward in a positive way, putting the person who is cyberbullying you firmly in the past.

6. Don’t isolate yourself from friends and family.

A common, sometimes unconscious reaction to being bullied is to shut down and withdraw from your loved ones. We begin to distance ourselves both emotionally and physically from the very people we need support from.

Depriving yourself of any sort of support or friendship certainly won’t do anything to resolve the issue. We know it might feel like the best thing to do, but it will only make things worse in the long run by silencing you and reducing your self-esteem. Try to keep up with your normal social life and activities you enjoy – the distraction if anything, will help lift your spirits and remind you of the positive things in your life.

7. Do tell someone.

Even if you don’t want to report it, it is important you share with someone what you are going through – you shouldn’t go through something like this alone as it is extremely stressful, and can be emotionally draining to endure bullying.

This stress can have an impact on all areas of your life, including your mental wellbeing, ability to communicate with others, performance in school, self-esteem and confidence. It is therefore incredibly important that you tell somebody you trust about what you are going through; it doesn’t even have to be an adult – it could be a friend or somebody at Ditch the Label. It is vital, during this time, that you have a support system and people who you can rely on when you are feeling low, or unable to cope.

8. Do keep a record.

Keeping a record of all interactions with griefers (a player who deliberately harasses or irritates other players) is very important. Be vigilant from the beginning and screenshot anything offensive. This is your evidence when talking with game administrators. You have a responsibility to yourself and other gamers – you never know who you might inadvertently be protecting from future abuse by being proactive right now.

9. Do take some time out.

When you are very immersed in a game it can feel all-consuming – in a good way! However, when an unexpected griefer is thrown into the mix, it can quickly become a very negative and overwhelming experience.

Maybe take some time out, step away from the game and remove the cause of stress. Give yourself a chance to see things a little clearer – that way you can decide what the best plan of action is.

It is important during this time, that you remember to take good care of your health and mental wellbeing. Little things like eating a balanced diet, exercising, getting a good night’s sleep, relaxing and having quality time with friends and family can really improve physical and mental health, which will, in turn, reduce stress. Reductions in stress increase your clarity of vision, allowing you to better analyse difficult situations, which will make them much easier to deal with.

If you would prefer our easier to read version, please click here

Join our support community here where we have mentors that can advise and support.

RSS FORUM CHATS

  • Introduction for anyone who cares ✨✨
    Hey I'm Melina 😊. I am bisexual (and asexual 😊) Only my best friend (and anyone reading this) knows my sexuality and I'm planning on telling my homophobic family too when I am financially stable, but I am known for making spur of the moment decisions and changing my mind last minute so who knows! […]
  • Hobbies
    Hey all, I was wondering what the acceptable number of hobbies is because I have 30 hobbies and I don't know what to do
  • This club is so good
    This club is so good that it has now become a lunchtime club at my school so well done to you bingabong
  • came out as bi to parents... they dont beleive me
    so a few days ago i came out as bi to my parents... they dont believe me. they think i was 1. wanting attention 2. friends are a bad influence and made me think this 3.just questioning myself i said this earlier what do ido
  • the safe lgbt chat
    hey! I hope everyone is having a good day and I just wanted to say that if you want to talk on here for advice or just to have a friend this is a place to be! for some that don't know me my name is leaf and I go by he/him pronouns. I am […]
  • Does anyone else agree that social media is toxic?
    Recently social media toxicity has been on my mind. I see lots of people on the internet promoting toxic lifestyles, getting followers, subscribers, and money. Also, it seems like the bigwigs of social media are very toxic, and often not expecting of others. Any one else feel this way?

Anger can be a useful emotion because it tells us when something is unfair or unjust.

We’re often told to hide our anger or to squash it down, but no emotion is a bad one, and we can’t turn them off.

Instead, we should see anger as motivation to try and address the unfairness we’re experiencing – but we need to do it in a productive way. So how do we deal with anger?

Although we all experience anger differently, it tends to follow the same general path. We start off calm, but then something triggers a feeling of anger in us and we become bothered. If we aren’t able to deal with that, it can escalate to anger and eventually can result in a pretty dramatic eruption.

So, to avoid an eruption, here’s how you can reprogramme your anger into something positive.

angry teenager, sitting on a dock, how to deal with anger

Reprogramming Your Anger

1. Recognise your trigger and how you’re feeling

Ask yourself questions

  • Am I angry or is it a different feeling?
  • What has caused it?

Then check your body for

  • Increased heart rate
  • Sweaty palms
  • Hot face
  • Clenched jaw

Check your mind for

  • Irritation
  • Erratic thoughts
  • Clouded thinking

Then check your behaviour

  • Are you acting as you would if you were calm?

2. Pause the escalation for a moment so you can reassess

  • Control your breathing 
  • Count to ten
  • Go for a walk
  • Put it in perspective: “will this matter tomorrow? next week? next year?”
angry cat, ditch the label

Want to find out more about why we get angry? Read this.

3. Change course by reacting to the problem in a different way

Slow it down

Give yourself and the other person time to explain your views. Pause the conversation if you need to.

Write it as a letter

Write a letter or email explaining how you feel

Focus on ‘I’

Change it from ‘you’ focused to ‘I’ focused. Instead of ‘You don’t care about me’, say ‘I miss spending time with you’

Let it go

Accept that sometimes things won’t change

4. Channel your excess energy into something that benefits you

  • Exercise
  • Write a journal
  • Get creative
  • Sing
  • Dance
  • Draw
  • Take it out on a cushion
  • Write a letter to your MP
  • Organise an assembly at school
  • Campaign for change
  • Run a fundraiser

For help and support, talk to our online community here.

RSS FORUM CHATS

  • Introduction for anyone who cares ✨✨
    Hey I'm Melina 😊. I am bisexual (and asexual 😊) Only my best friend (and anyone reading this) knows my sexuality and I'm planning on telling my homophobic family too when I am financially stable, but I am known for making spur of the moment decisions and changing my mind last minute so who knows! […]
  • Hobbies
    Hey all, I was wondering what the acceptable number of hobbies is because I have 30 hobbies and I don't know what to do
  • This club is so good
    This club is so good that it has now become a lunchtime club at my school so well done to you bingabong
  • came out as bi to parents... they dont beleive me
    so a few days ago i came out as bi to my parents... they dont believe me. they think i was 1. wanting attention 2. friends are a bad influence and made me think this 3.just questioning myself i said this earlier what do ido
  • the safe lgbt chat
    hey! I hope everyone is having a good day and I just wanted to say that if you want to talk on here for advice or just to have a friend this is a place to be! for some that don't know me my name is leaf and I go by he/him pronouns. I am […]
  • Does anyone else agree that social media is toxic?
    Recently social media toxicity has been on my mind. I see lots of people on the internet promoting toxic lifestyles, getting followers, subscribers, and money. Also, it seems like the bigwigs of social media are very toxic, and often not expecting of others. Any one else feel this way?

This content is password protected. To view it please enter your password below:

RSS FORUM CHATS

  • Introduction for anyone who cares ✨✨
    Hey I'm Melina 😊. I am bisexual (and asexual 😊) Only my best friend (and anyone reading this) knows my sexuality and I'm planning on telling my homophobic family too when I am financially stable, but I am known for making spur of the moment decisions and changing my mind last minute so who knows! […]
  • Hobbies
    Hey all, I was wondering what the acceptable number of hobbies is because I have 30 hobbies and I don't know what to do
  • This club is so good
    This club is so good that it has now become a lunchtime club at my school so well done to you bingabong
  • came out as bi to parents... they dont beleive me
    so a few days ago i came out as bi to my parents... they dont believe me. they think i was 1. wanting attention 2. friends are a bad influence and made me think this 3.just questioning myself i said this earlier what do ido
  • the safe lgbt chat
    hey! I hope everyone is having a good day and I just wanted to say that if you want to talk on here for advice or just to have a friend this is a place to be! for some that don't know me my name is leaf and I go by he/him pronouns. I am […]
  • Does anyone else agree that social media is toxic?
    Recently social media toxicity has been on my mind. I see lots of people on the internet promoting toxic lifestyles, getting followers, subscribers, and money. Also, it seems like the bigwigs of social media are very toxic, and often not expecting of others. Any one else feel this way?

This content is password protected. To view it please enter your password below:

RSS FORUM CHATS

  • Introduction for anyone who cares ✨✨
    Hey I'm Melina 😊. I am bisexual (and asexual 😊) Only my best friend (and anyone reading this) knows my sexuality and I'm planning on telling my homophobic family too when I am financially stable, but I am known for making spur of the moment decisions and changing my mind last minute so who knows! […]
  • Hobbies
    Hey all, I was wondering what the acceptable number of hobbies is because I have 30 hobbies and I don't know what to do
  • This club is so good
    This club is so good that it has now become a lunchtime club at my school so well done to you bingabong
  • came out as bi to parents... they dont beleive me
    so a few days ago i came out as bi to my parents... they dont believe me. they think i was 1. wanting attention 2. friends are a bad influence and made me think this 3.just questioning myself i said this earlier what do ido
  • the safe lgbt chat
    hey! I hope everyone is having a good day and I just wanted to say that if you want to talk on here for advice or just to have a friend this is a place to be! for some that don't know me my name is leaf and I go by he/him pronouns. I am […]
  • Does anyone else agree that social media is toxic?
    Recently social media toxicity has been on my mind. I see lots of people on the internet promoting toxic lifestyles, getting followers, subscribers, and money. Also, it seems like the bigwigs of social media are very toxic, and often not expecting of others. Any one else feel this way?

This content is password protected. To view it please enter your password below:

RSS FORUM CHATS

  • Introduction for anyone who cares ✨✨
    Hey I'm Melina 😊. I am bisexual (and asexual 😊) Only my best friend (and anyone reading this) knows my sexuality and I'm planning on telling my homophobic family too when I am financially stable, but I am known for making spur of the moment decisions and changing my mind last minute so who knows! […]
  • Hobbies
    Hey all, I was wondering what the acceptable number of hobbies is because I have 30 hobbies and I don't know what to do
  • This club is so good
    This club is so good that it has now become a lunchtime club at my school so well done to you bingabong
  • came out as bi to parents... they dont beleive me
    so a few days ago i came out as bi to my parents... they dont believe me. they think i was 1. wanting attention 2. friends are a bad influence and made me think this 3.just questioning myself i said this earlier what do ido
  • the safe lgbt chat
    hey! I hope everyone is having a good day and I just wanted to say that if you want to talk on here for advice or just to have a friend this is a place to be! for some that don't know me my name is leaf and I go by he/him pronouns. I am […]
  • Does anyone else agree that social media is toxic?
    Recently social media toxicity has been on my mind. I see lots of people on the internet promoting toxic lifestyles, getting followers, subscribers, and money. Also, it seems like the bigwigs of social media are very toxic, and often not expecting of others. Any one else feel this way?