You got that feeling in your stomach where you kinda feel like you could throw up? Maybe they’ve been stuck in your head for longer than Old Town Road? Well, it sounds like you got a crush. When you fancy someone, it can be totally overwhelming to know what to do. How do you talk to them? What do you say? How do you not scare them off? All these questions, we got the answers.
1) Don’t sit 56 weeks back in their Instagram
Hey, if you aren’t hanging out in their past, you definitely can’t accidentally like something. Plus going up to them and reciting every holiday and pet they’ve ever had in the past five years is probably only going to freak them out. Keep your cool, and do you.
2) Have fun with it
So, it might seem a little overwhelming at this point, and when you can’t get someone out of your head it can be easy to forget to just be you. Despite this, it’s a really exciting time when you like someone or when something is just starting out, so remember to have fun. Chat to close friends about it, and then drop the subject and just have a good time like always. Letting your crush take over your life is a quick way to annoy your mates, and probably have this information work its way straight to the ears of the person you fancy.
3) Try not to let on to too many people
It might be tempting to shout from the rooftops that you are feeling super into this person and if you want to do that, then nothing should stop you. The only thing to remember is that information travels fast, and can very easily get somewhere you don’t want it to. Save yourself the stress and keep it under wraps until you feel really certain.
4) Get some intelligence from mutual friends
If you aren’t sure you are ready to talk to them but still need to know their current relationships statue, go to a trusted friend that you share, or someone you think might know. Casually drop it into conversation rather than making the whole interaction about that and they won’t suspect a thing. This way, if they are dating someone, you know before you do anything else.
5) Talk to them
Spending time with them. Sounds simple, we know. But it really is the best way to get some face time with them. You can see if your personalities gel, find out things you have in common and see if you share a sense of humour. It’s a sure-fire way to see if you two would actually work out IRL, and you can usually pick up on signals from them if they like you too. Get a little flirty and see what happens. Don’t be nervous, you got this.
6) Be yourself
The most important thing to remember is that when you like someone, you should be you and nothing else. Whilst it might seem like a good idea to say you have definitely watched all the Lord of the Rings movies, enjoy musicals or play an instrument because they do, it will come back to bite you when actually have to do these things. Besides, if they don’t love you at your Civil War Captain America, then they don’t deserve you at your Endgame Captain America.
And if it doesn’t work out for you…
7) Respect their decision
So, it sucks that they don’t feel the same way. Of course, it sucks. But it’s important to respect that this is how it’s turned out and move on. We know that every rom-com, romantic novel and soap opera in the world would make you think that pursuing them endlessly would make it work, but it only comes off creepy. Need help moving on? Check out this list of things you can do to get over someone.
8) Remember, it’s just this time
We aren’t gonna say there are plenty more fish in the sea. But just because it didn’t work out this time does not mean it won’t work out next time you meet someone you quite like. We absolutely promise that one day, someone will come along who likes you too, and it will all work out exactly as you hoped.
Need some advice? Speak to one of our trained mentors in confidence here